He
it is Who shapes you in the wombs as He pleases. Lâ ilâha illa
Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), the All-Mighty, the
All-Wise.
[Qur'an
3:6]
Du'a
(Supplication)
A good dua (supplication) to
make when desiring a child:
The Noble Qur'an - Al-A'raf
7:189
It is He Who has created you from a single
person (Adam), and (then) He has created from him his wife [Hawwa (Eve)],
in order that he might enjoy the pleasure of living with her. When he had
sexual relation with her, she became pregnant and she carried it about lightly.
Then when it became heavy, they both invoked Allâh, their Lord (saying):
"If You give us a Sâlih (good in every aspect) child, we shall indeed
be among the grateful."
Dua for infertile couples:
The du'a of Zakariyya (Zakariah), 'alayhis-salaam, which he made in his old
age while his wife was barren but Allah, swt, answered his call and gave
him Yahyah (John), 'alayhis-salaam.
The Noble Qur'an Al-'Imran
3:38
"Rabbi hab li min ladunka dhurriyyatan tayyibatan
innaka samee' al-du'aa' "
..."O my Lord! Grant me from You, a good offspring.
You are indeed the All-Hearer of invocation."
Dua that can be made often during
the woman's labor pains or any other times of distress and hardship:
Allaahumma laa sahla 'illa maa ja'altahu sahlan wa 'anta taja'lu-l-hazna
'idha shi 'ta sahlan. - "O Allah, there is nothing easy except what
You make easy. You can make grief, if You wish,
easy." [Recorded by ibn al-Sunee; According
to al-Hilaali, this hadith is sahih. See al-Hilaali, vol. 1, p.
345.]
All Babies are Born
Muslim
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 8.597 (See also
2.467), Narrated Abu Huraira
Allah's Apostle was asked about the offspring
of the pagans. He said, "Allah knows what they would have done (were they
to live)."
Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said,
"No child is born but has the Islamic Faith, but its parents turn it into
a Jew or a Christian. It is as you help the animals give birth. Do you find
among their offspring a mutilated one before you mutilate them yourself?"
The people said, "O Allah's Apostle! What do you think about those (of them)
who die young?" The Prophet said, "Allah knows what they would have done
(were they to live)."
The Noble Qur'an Ar-Rum
30:30
So set you (O Muhammad SAW) your face towards
the religion of pure Islâmic Monotheism Hanifa (worship none
but Allâh Alone) Allâh's Fitrah (i.e. Allâh's
Islâmic Monotheism), with which He has created mankind. No change let
there be in Khalqillâh (i.e. the Religion of Allâh
Islâmic Monotheism), that is the straight religion, but most of men
know not.
Blood Money Due for deceased
child is also due for deceased Fetus
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 8.732, Narrated
Abu Huraira
Allah's Apostle gave the judgment that a male
or female slave should be given in Qisas for an abortion case of a woman
from the tribe of Bani Lihyan (as blood money for the fetus) but the lady
on whom the penalty had been imposed died, so the Prophets ordered that her
property be inherited by her offspring and her husband and that the penalty
be paid by her Asaba.
A Cause of
Miscarriage
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 4.518, Narrated
Ibn Umar
That he heard the Prophet delivering a sermon
on the pulpit saying, "Kill snakes and kill Dhu-at-Tufyatain (i.e. a snake
with two white lines on its back) and ALBATROSS (i.e. a snake with short
or mutilated tail) for they destroy the sight of one's eyes and bring about
abortion." ('Abdullah bin 'Umar further added): Once while I was chasing
a snake in order to kill it, Abu Lubaba called me saying: "Don't kill it,"
I said. "Allah's Apostle ordered us to kill snakes." He said, "But later
on he prohibited the killing of snakes living in the houses." (Az-Zubri said.
"Such snakes are called Al-Awamir.")
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 4.529, Narrated
Abu Mulaika
Ibn Umar used to kill snakes, but afterwards
he forbade their killing and said, "Once the Prophet pulled down a wall and
saw a cast-off skin of a snake in it. He said, 'Look for the snake.' They
found it and the Prophet said, 'Kill it.' For this reason I used to kill
snakes. Later on I met Abu Lubaba who told me the Prophet said, 'Do not kill
snakes except the short-tailed or mutilated-tailed snake with two white lines
on its back, for it causes abortion and makes one blind. So kill it.' "
A Miscarriage or Murder
of Fetus
Caused by Another Person
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 9.42A, Narrated
Hishams father from Al Mughira bin Shuba
Allah's Apostle gave the judgment that a male
or female slave should be given in Qisas for an abortion case of a woman
from the tribe of Bani Lihyan (as blood money for the fetus) but the lady
on whom the penalty had been imposed died, so the Prophets ordered that her
property be inherited by her offspring and her husband and that the penalty
be paid by her Asaba.
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 9.420, Narrated
Al Mughira bin Shuba
'Umar bin Al-Khattab asked (the people) about
the Imlas of a woman, i.e., a woman who has an abortion because of having
been beaten on her abdomen, saying, "Who among you has heard anything about
it from the Prophet?" I said, "I did.) He said, "What is that?" I said, "I
heard the Prophet saying, 'Its Diya (blood money) is either a male or a female
slave.' " 'Umar said, "Do not leave till you present witness in support of
your statement." So I went out, and found Muhammad bin Maslama. I brought
him, and he bore witness with me that he had heard the Prophet saying, "Its
Diya (blood money) is either a male slave or a female slave."
Hadith - Abu Dawood 4555, Narrated Umar
ibn al-Khattab
Ibn Abbas said: Umar asked about the decision
of the Prophet (peace be upon him) about that (i.e. abortion) Haml ibn Malik
ibn an-Nabighah got up and said: I was between two women. One of them struck
another with a rolling-pin killing both her and what was in her womb. So
the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) gave judgment that the blood-wit
for the unborn child should be a male or a female slave of the best quality
and that she should be killed.
Haram (Forbidden) for
Wife not to tell Husband when She is Pregnant
The Noble Qur'an Al-Baqarah
2:228
"...it is not lawful for them to conceal what
Allâh has created in their wombs"
Idda of Widows when
Pregnant
Hadith - Al-Muwatta
29.83
Yahya related to me from Malik from Abdu Rabbih
ibn Said ibn Qays that Abu Salama ibn Abd ar-Rahman said that Abdullah ibn
Abbas and Abu Hurayra were asked when a pregnant woman whose husband had
died could remarry. Ibn Abbas said, "At the end of two periods." Abu Hurayra
said,
"When she gives birth, she is free to marry." Abu Salama ibn Abd ar-Rahman
visited Umm Salama, the wife of the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant
him peace, and asked her about it Umm Salama said, ''Subaya al-Aslamiya gave
birth half a month after the death of her husband, and two men asked to marry
her. One was young and the other was old. She preferred the young man and
so the older man said, 'You are not free to marry yet.' Her family were away
and he hoped that when her family came, they would give her to him. She went
to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and he
said, 'You are free to marry, so marry whomever you wish.' "
Why the Baby Cries when
Born
Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 4.641, Narrated
Sa'id bin Al Musaiyab
Abu Huraira said, "I heard Allah's Apostle
saying, 'There is none born among the off-spring of Adam, but Satan touches
it. A child therefore, cries loudly at the time of birth because of the touch
of Satan, except Mary and her child." Then Abu Huraira recited: "And I seek
refuge with You for her and for her offspring from the outcast Satan"
(3.36)
The Pregnant Woman's
Property
Hadith - Al-Muwatta
37.4a
Yahya said that he heard Malik say, "The best
of what I have heard about the testament of a pregnant woman and about what
settlements she is permitted in her property is that the pregnant woman is
like the sick person. When the illness is light, and one does not fear for
the sick person, he does with his property what he likes. If the illness
is such that his life is feared for, he can only dispose of a third of his
estate."
He said, "It is the same with a woman who is
pregnant. The beginning of pregnancy is good news and joy. It is not illness
and no fear because Allah the Blessed, the Exalted, said in His Book, 'We
gave her good news of Ishaq and after Ishaq, Yaqub.' (Sura ll ayat 71). And
He said, 'She bore a light burden and passed by with it, but when she became
heavy, they called upon Allah, their Lord, "If you give us a good-doing son,
we will be among the thankful." '(Sura 7 ayat 189).
"When a pregnant woman becomes heavy, she is
only permitted to dispose of a third of her estate. The beginning of this
restriction is after six months. Allah, the Blessed, the Exalted, said in
His Book, 'Mothers suckle their children for two complete years.' And He
said, 'his bearing and weaning are thirty months.' (Sura 2 ayat 233).
"When six months have passed for the pregnant
woman from the day she conceived, she is only permitted to dispose of a third
of her property."
Yahya said that he heard Malik say, "A man
who is advancing in the row for battle, can only dispose of a third of his
property. He is in the same position as a pregnant woman or an ill person
who is feared for, as long as he is in that situation."
Combining Prayers During
Hardships Occuring During Pregnancy
Fiqh 2.118
Ahmad, Qadi Hussain,
al-Khattabi, and al-Mutawali of the Shaf'i school are of the opinion that
it is allowed to combine two prayers, either during the time of the earlier
or later salah, due to illness as it is a greater hardship than rain. An-Nawawi
says: "This is a strong opinion based on [sound] evidence." In al-Mughni
it is stated: "The illness which permits one to combine the prayers is the
one which would otherwise cause hardship and more weakness [if he prayed
each salah separately]."
The Hanbali school is the most accommodating
as it allows one to combine the prayers, at the time of the early or later
salah, for one who is ill as well as for the woman who is breast-feeding
and will face hardship in cleaning her dress for every salah, for the woman
who is plagued by a prolonged flow of blood, for the person who cannot control
his urine, and for one who cannot purify himself or herself, and for the
one who fears for his life, property, or family.
Ibn Taimiyyah says: "Among the opinions the
most accommodating on this question is that of the Hanbali school which allows
one to combine the prayers if he is busy (since an-Nasa'i has related something
to that effect from the Prophet sallallahu alehi wasallam) and they also
say that the cook and baker, and so forth., may also combine their prayers
if they fear their wealth (i.e., their investment or what they are working
on) will otherwise be ruined."
Fasting During
Ramadan
Fiqh-us-Sunnah 3.115
Pregnant and breast-feeding women, if they
fear for themselves or for the baby, can break the fast and pay the "ransom."
They do not have to make up the days missed. Abu Dawud related from 'Ikrimah
that Ibn 'Abbas said concerning the 'ayah "And for those who can fast [but
do not],": "This is a concession for the elderly, as they can fast. They
are to break the fast and feed one poor person a day. Pregnant or breast-feeding
women, if they fear for the child, can do likewise." This is related by
al-Bazzar. At the end of the report, there is the addition: "Ibn 'Abbas used
to say to his wives who were pregnant: 'You are in the same situation as
those who can fast [but do not]. You are to pay the "ransom" and do not have
to make up the days later.' " Of its chain, ad-Daraqutni says it is
sahih.
Nafi' reported that Ibn 'Umar was asked about
a pregnant woman who feared for her unborn baby. He replied: "She is to break
the fast and to feed one poor person a day one madd of barley."
There is also a hadith that states: "Allah
has relieved the travelers of fasting and half of the prayer, and the pregnant
and the breast-feeding women of the fast." According to the Hanafiyyah, Abu
Ubaid, and Abu Thaur, such women are only to make up the missed days of fasting,
and they are not supposed to feed one poor person a day. According to Ahmad
and ash-Shaf'i, if such women fear only for the baby, they must pay the "ransom"
and make up the days later. If they fear only for themselves or for themselves
and the baby, then they are only to make up the missed days at a later
date.
WHAT TO DO UPON
BIRTH
Recite Adhan in Baby's
Ear
Hadith - Sunan of Abu Dawud #5086, Narrated
Abu Rafi'
I saw the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him)
uttering the call to prayer (Adhan) in the ear of al-Hasan ibn Ali when Fatimah
gave birth to him.
Inviting Guests to Celebrate
a Birth
Hadith - Bukhari's Book of Manners
#1258
Bilal ibn Ka'b said, "Ibrahim ibn Adham, 'Abd
al 'Aziz ibn Qarir, Musa ibn Yasar, and myself visited Hahya ibn Hassan at
his village (in Palestine). He brought us food. Musa, who was fasting, did
not eat. Yahya said, 'A man known as Abu Qarasifah from the tribe of Kinanah
who had been one of the Companions of the Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace,
led us in salah (prostration prayer) for forty years in this mosque.
It was his habit to fast one day and skip the next. A boy was born to my
father on a day when Abu Qarasifah was fasting, and he invited Abu Qarasifah
to attend the feast. So Abu Qarasifah broke his fast.' The Ibrahim stood
up and brushed Yahya off with his cloak*, and Musa broke his fast.
*this was done as
a sign of respect for the man.
Sweetening the Mouth of
the Newborn
Hadith - Sahih Muslim, Abu Dawud, and
Ibn Majah
Anas said, "I went to the Prophet of Allah,
upon him be peace, with 'Abd Allah ibn Abi Talhah on the day that he was
born. The Prophet was wearing a cloak (outside) seeing to a camel. So he
said to me, 'Do you have any dates with you?' I said, 'Yes' and handed them
to him. He moistened them with his tongue, opened the child's mouth, and
placed the softened dates inside. When the boy showed that he liked them,
the Prophet, upon him be peace, said, 'This is the love of the Ansar for
their dates.' And then he named the boy 'Abd Allah."
Praying for the
Newborn
Hadith - Bukhari's Book of Manners
#1260
Mu'awiyah ibn Qurrah said, "When my son Iyas
was born, I invited several of the Companions of the Prophet [to a feast]
and fed them. Then they prayed (for me and my son). I said, 'You have prayed,
and may Allah bless you for your prayers. Now, I am going to pray, so please
say "Ameen" [to all that I pray for]. Then I prayed long for my son's religion,
his mind, and so on."
The Day of
Aqeeqah
The practices which can be performed on the day of Aqeeqah are -
-
Of course, the Aqeeqah (slaughtering of sheep on behalf of the child).
-
The shaving of the child's head and paying its weight in gold or silver in
charity.
-
Naming the child.
-
The child can be circumcised.
Imam Malik said, "The aqiqa is not obligatory but it is desirable to do it"
Hadith - Al-Muwatta 26.5
Yahya related to me from Malik from Rabia ibn
Abi Abd ar-Rahman that Muhammad ibn Ibrahim ibn al-Harith at-Taymi said,
"I heard my father say that the aqiqa was desirable, even if it was only
a sparrow."
Hadith - Al-Muwatta 26.2
Yahya related to me from Malik from Jafar ibn
Muhammad that his father said, "Fatima, the daughter of the Messenger of
Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, weighed the hair of Hasan,
Husayn, Zaynab and Umm Kulthum, and gave away in sadaqa an equivalent weight
of silver."
Q. With regards to a new-born child's Aqeeqah, what number of animals
should be slaughtered for a boy or girl?
Answer by Abu Ameena Bilal Philips:
The normal practice for the Aqeeqah is to slaughter 2 (goat or sheep)
for a boy and 1 for a girl. However, in the case of Hasan and Hussain, the
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) slaughtered 1 for each of them. So it is permissible
to sacrifice one or two for a boy.
One important point to remember, is that the Prophet (pbuh) stated that the
sacrifice is primarily on behalf of the child, even though some individuals
think that it is primarily for the family. The child benefits from the sacrifice,
just as a parent prays on behalf of their child, for the child's benefit.
The Prophet (pbuh) even sacrificed for himself because at the time of his
birth nobody sacrificed for him. It is, therefore, permissible for Muslims
to do so if it wasn't done for them at birth.
The secondary principle of sacrificing for the child, is that the parents
are taking from their wealth and thanking Allah for giving them this child.
The normal practice of distributing the meat, is to give 1/3 to the poor
and needy, 1/3 to neighbors and friends and 1/3 is kept by the family. But
it is ultimately up to the parents to decide how it is distributed. As stated
earlier, some of the meat should be given in charity, so that the blessings
for this act are given to the child.
The Prophet (pbuh) recommended that the Aqeeqah be held on the 7th day after
the birth of the child, but it may be done later if one does not have the
opportunity. The Prophet (pbuh) said that the child is held in mortgage to
the sacrifice, so that in making the sacrifice, it frees the child from something
which is connected to the child, something similar to a debt. But exactly
what it is, Allah knows.
Circumcision
Fiqh 1.21a
This prevents dirt from getting on one's penis,
and also makes it easy to keep it clean. For women, it involves cutting the
outer portion of the clitoris. Abu Hurairah reported that the Messenger of
Allah said, "Ibrahim circumcised himself after he was eighty years old."
(Related by al-Bukhari.) Many scholars say that it is obligatory.' The Shaf'iyyah
maintain that it should be done on the seventh day.
Circumcising a female is not
a recommended act, but it is considered permissible so long as very little
cutting is done. Be careful to find a reputable person to perform circumcision
on a female, as many errors are made by the untrained; check with those who
have received the circumcision to ensure safety and proper cutting
technique.
Hadith - Abu Dawood #5251, Narrated Umm
Atiyyah al-Ansariyyah
A woman used to perform circumcision in Medina.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said to her: Do not cut severely as that
is better for a woman and more desirable for a husband.
Praising Allah for a Healthy
Son or Daughter
Hadith - Bukhari's Book of Manners
#1261
Kathir ibn 'Ubayd said, "Whenever a child was
born among them, 'A'ishah would not ask if it were a boy or a girl. Instead
she would ask, 'Is the child healthy (and without defect)?' If she was told,
'Yes,' she would say, 'Al-hamdulilah ar-Rabeel Alameen (All praise
is for Allah, Lord of All the Worlds.'
How to congratulate new
parents and how they should respond
Hadith - An-Nawawi, Kitabul-Adhkar, p.
349.
Baarakallahu laka fil mauhoobi laka, wa shakartal
waahiba, wa balagha ashaddahu, wa ruziqta birrahu. ["May Allah bless you
with His gift to you, and may the receiver give thanks and reach the maturity
of years and be granted piety."]
The reply is: Barakallahu laka wa baraka 'alaika,
wa jaza kallahu khairan, wa raza-qakallahu mithalhu, wa ajzala thawabaka.
["May Allah bless you, and shower His blessings upon you, and may Allah reward
you well and bestow upon you its like and reward you with open hands."]
Breastfeeding
The Noble Qur'an - Luqmaan
31:14
And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful
and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon
weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years give thanks to Me
and to your parents, unto Me is the final destination.
The Noble Qur'an - Al-Baqarah
2:233 regarding divorced couples...
The mothers shall give suck to their children
for two whole years, (that is) for those (parents) who desire to complete
the term of suckling, but the father of the child shall bear the cost of
the mother's food and clothing on a reasonable basis. No person shall have
a burden laid on him greater than he can bear. No mother shall be treated
unfairly on account of her child, nor father on account of his child. And
on the (father's) heir is incumbent the like of that (which was incumbent
on the father). If they both decide on weaning, by mutual consent, and after
due consultation, there is no sin on them. And if you decide on a foster
suckling-mother for your children, there is no sin on you, provided you pay
(the mother) what you agreed (to give her) on reasonable basis. And fear
Allâh and know that Allâh is All-Seer of what you do.
The child has the right
to be fed breast milk (by the mother or foster-mother) for two full years,
until weaned (eating solid foods). Even if the mother is to be executed for
a crime, the baby's right comes first. Parents should not feed baby formula
(powdered milk, etc.) to a child who has not yet been weaned as a substitution
for breastmilk unless all other viable options are exhausted in an effort
to provide obtaining breast milk (for instance: medical problems, death of
the mother and unavailability of a wet-nurse).
Hadith - Al-Muwatta 41.5
Malik related to me from Yaqub ibn Zayd ibn
Talha from his father Zayd ibn Talha that Abdullah ibn Abi Mulayka informed
him that a woman came to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, and informed him that she had committed adultery and was
pregnant. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace,
said to her, "Go away until you give birth." When she had given birth, she
came to him. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace,
said to her, "Go away until you have suckled and weaned the baby." When she
had weaned the baby, she came to him. He said, "Go and entrust the baby to
someone." She entrusted the baby to someone and then came to him. He gave
the order and she was stoned.
Please note that nobody will
get it to be exactly two years, as the length of weaning until the
child is actually weaned, depends on the child (statistically it takes a
few months up to 6 mo. approx). But it appears clear that the goal, barring
any health risks or condition that would prevent breastfeeding, should be
two Islamic years of breastfeeding and that the child should completely
be weaned off the breast sometime shortly after the completion of two
years.
Tafsir Ibn Kathir, Vol. 1 of 10, p. 654,
under section "No Darar (Harm) or Dirar (Revenge)":
"We should state that Ibn Jarir has explained
this subject in detail in his Tafsir and that he also stated that suckling
the child after the second year might harm the child's body and mind.
Sufyan Ath-Thawri narrated that 'Alqamah asked a woman who was suckling her
child after the second year ended, not to do that. (At-Tabari)".
____________
The following excerpt is taken
from The Fragile Vessels (Book Three- The Muslim Family) written by
Muhammad Al-Jibaly, p. 92-96.
Breastfeeding the Children
A woman has the obligation of breast feeding her children for up to two complete
years. Allah says: "Mothers should nurse their children two complete years--
for whosoever desires to complete the nursing term." (Al Baqarah 2:233)
A woman may not forsake this important obligation unless she has an ISLAMICALLY
acceptable excuse, such as a genuine medial problem. Women who deny their
children their nursing rights are liable to punishment in the grave and in
the Hereafter.
Abu Umamah al-Bahili reported that Allah's Messenger (saw) said:
"While I was sleeping, two men (angels) came to me, held my upper arms, and
took me to a rough mountain. They said," Climb." I said," I cannot climb
it."
They said, " We will make it easy for you."
He continued: " So I ascended until I reached a high place in the mountain.
I heard fierce cries and asked, " What are those cries?" The replied, " That
is the howling of the people of the Fire."
He continued: "We moved on until I saw some people who were suspended by
their Achilles' tendons, their cheeks cut and gushing blood. I asked, "Who
are those?" The replied, "Those are the ones who break their fast when it
is not permissible."
He continued: "We moved on until I saw people whowere awfully swollen, and
had the most foul stench and the most hideous appearance. I asked," Who are
those?" He replied,"Those are the dead of the kuffar (on the battlefield)."
He continued: "We moved on until I saw some people who were awfully swollen,
and had the most foul stench--their stench was like that of gutters. I asked,"
Who are those?" The replied," Those are the male and female adulterers."
He continued: "We moved on until I saw some women with snakes biting at
their breasts. I asked," Who are those?" The replied, " Those are the women
who deny their children their milk."
He continued: "We moved on until I saw boys playing between two rivers. I
asked," who are those?" The replied, " Those are the believers' offspring
(who die before puberty.)
Recorded by Ibn Khuzaymah (no.1986), Ibn Hibban and others. Verified to be
authentic by Sheikh Albani (Sahih ut-Targhib no.991)
Related Links:
Action Items for
the
uttaqun:
-
Do not forget Allah
swt when desiring a child. Desire the child to earn the favor of your
Lord.
-
Know that we do not
own nor create a child; life comes only from Allah swt. Just as it is given,
it can be taken away, so we should not feel that we own a child; instead,
recognize it as a gift from Allah, swt, that can earn us paradise or hellfires,
subject to how we take care of what Allah swt has bestowed upon
us.
-
Give the baby its
right to receive breastmilk, and only turn to formula if the mother is unable
to produce the needed milk and unable to pay a Muslim wet-nurse. Keep in
mind that the more food or drink given to the baby, the less milk the woman
will produce as a result of the less sucking; when starting breastfeeding,
do not offer any supplements until long after breastfeeding is established
months later.
-
Do not expose the
breast in public when breast-feeding. Muslim women commonly nurse the child
under the khimar (garment covering the head and chest) when in any
type of public setting.
Remember... Allah, subhana watala,
sees everything we do!
